Faith, Self

To The Girl Who Is Entering Summer Alone

“Right now is the perfect time to fall in love with your life.

Birds are chirping.  The sun is shining.  Exams are wrapping up.  The grass is becoming green once again.  And suddenly, after a long school year, and an even longer winter, it is finally safe to say that summer is within reach.  Long days under the sun, and late nights under the stars are finally moments away, and the memories that are about to be made are endless within our imagination.  The last minute road trips. The long sun-filled lake days. The camping trips in the wilderness.  The beach days spent getting fried like a lobster.  All these pleasing thoughts are beginning to race through our minds, and we begin to get a feeling of excitement. Nevertheless, making those memories in this generation can sometimes feel like it will be very difficult.

Summer is not always the late night bonfires, and drive in movie dates like we have it played out in our heads. I know for me, I have spent several summers hanging out constantly, with friends who didn’t support me, or sometimes I am have spent them alone.  And by alone, yes I mean single.  Does that make you feel a little weird to read?  A girl complaining about being single for the summer?  Well… I am sure I am not alone on this one.  We live in a society that makes relationships seem so effortless.  Especially during the summertime.  Our society has portrayed summer romance so vividly through tweets about “relationship goals” or instagram pictures getting hundreds of likes that it seems as if everyone should have a summer fling!  I know I used to be that girl who could only dream of finding my guy on the lake, and having that typical summer romance.  But you know what?  In my experience, it was not all it’s cracked up to be.  And even more so, it has hurt.  It has not really been  fun developing a relationship during what we think to be a careless and free time of our lives.  Because, for me, it has really been unrealistic.  I do not have a lot of free time,  I do not drink that frequently, I do not stay up till the crack of dawn… And things that were priorities for me usually are not the same on the other side.  Do not get me wrong, it is fun to stay up late, have a beer by the fire, and text a cute boy, but… in reality, that is not the “norm” for our day-to-day life.

Now where am I going with this, you ask?  No, I am not preaching to not pursue a relationship in the summer.  And I am also not telling you to dump your boyfriend for the next three months.  All I’m saying is; do not worry about being single when society tells you that being alone is wrong.  Because it is not!  Being alone is good.  You learn what your dreams are and how to pursue them.  You figure out what inspires you and how to go about it.  It is not a bad thing.  What I am trying to say is that we all want romance, whether we admit it or not.  And even more so, a lot of us think it is going to happen in the summertime, guilty as charged.  I have thought this for many years, and I’m just finally coming to the realization that I should not be focused on that… So.  What I want to urge you to do this summer is to invest full heartedly in something you deem worthwhile for yourself.  Put yourself first this summer.  Do not be ashamed of entering summer single once again and not being able to take cute pictures, or go on adorable summer dates (I used to think this way!), but instead, invest in your SELF HAPPINESS AND SELF LOVE.

With that said, here are a few things that I have vowed to myself (I hope you do too), to work on this summer in another season of singleness.  I have promised myself that I am going to make the most out of my freedom by investing more in myself, and also by investing in people who I can see being there long term.

Work on yourself – develop your goals, your dreams, your passions

This summer, find out what motivates you.  Try to pinpoint what intrigues you and pushes you to be a better version of yourself.  Then, write it down, make a date, and start crushing the goal.

Find a new fitness hobby

Try to discover something new and exciting this summer that keeps you active.  Something that acts as a “getaway” for you when you need some alone time.

Spend loads of time with family and loved ones

Remember how I said this summer we should invest in those who are worthwhile? Well, I meant it!! Lets spend time with those who push us to meet our goals, respect our hobbies, and want to be with us every step of the way!

Develop your faith

Take some time this summer to really understand where your relationship is with the Lord.  Maybe it is kind of broken, maybe it is going great, or maybe it needs to start, but now is the PERFECT time to get to know Him.  Not only will you get more guidance over your life, but also more love and comfort.

Go on an adventure

It seems like everyone has a large summer bucket list of things they want to accomplish during the short 3 months of summer.  Kayaking.  Going to an amusement park.  Or even something crazy like skydiving.  I know that I usually have a bucket list of 40-60 things I want to do and that is SO unrealistic, at least for me.  This summer, try to place 2-4 fun, and big adventures.  It will make you feel a sense of accomplishment (if your like me and LOVE checking things off of a list), and also give you that fun summertime feeling!

 

Overall, I want you to be happy, but even more so be happy with being alone.  Eat alone, take yourself on dates, sleep alone.  In the midst of all of this, you will learn so much more about yourself.  You will grow, you will figure out what inspires you, you will create your own dreams, your own beliefs, your own stunning clarity, and when you do meet the person who makes your world go round, you will be sure of it, because you are sure of yourself.  

With all that I am,

Nicole 

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